The memory

The song by Orbital, ‘Satan’,

once told me that it is better to regret something

you have done, than something you haven’t

I’m not so sure.

No news is good news, it is said

Is it?

In one, you create a memory

In the other, the memory, the news, is created

I don’t trust the memories I create

Better to let something else do that

The memories I create

With my mind that whispers in Chinese

As it feeds the memories.

Instead of just singing

Watering the truth

Yesterday, I came across a zygotic memory

From a brief and meaningless encounter

It could have been born into

A healthy memory

But I chose to abort it

It didn’t feel right, not the right time

The seed of thought was corrupt, a mutant

Created in skewed and shameful darkness

I knew, that as the memory would grow

So too would the corruption

Infect my life

Bully the other memories

That memory was to be a baaad one

A black sheep that would haunt my dreams

Better to let the nicer ones through

Though I cannot conceive how, now.

03.01.08